There's No Wrong Way to Meditate

Few people who take up mindfulnessmeditation (here meaning Mindfulness Meditation, and the same throughout) escape the nagging worry of whether they are doing it properly. "I just can't clear my head!" and "I can't get into that state!" are what so many beginners quietly tell themselves. In truth, though, these doubts arise in large part from the misconceptions society holds about meditation.

To clear up those misconceptions, the first thing to understand is the purpose of meditation. Meditating is a way of cultivating a state of being present, of observing the mind without judging it. One key element is simply noticing your own mind as it is. If you notice that your mind is full of stray thoughts and that you cannot focus — that very act of noticing is already among the most essential parts of meditation.

Seen that way, what need is there to "clear the head" or to "get into a state"? The fact is, everyone meditates differently: some people feel deeply calm; others notice that their thoughts never settle for a moment. But either way, it is simply an experience of the mind — neither better nor worse than any other.

Of course, even once you know the principle, you may still find your mind wandering the next time you meditate, and you may reproach yourself just as before. That is because our patterns of thinking build up over months and years, and they will not change overnight. So next time, rather than scolding yourself, simply observe that too — because noticing that you are blaming yourself is itself a kind of insight into the mind. Practise it this way, and over time the seed of mindful awareness will take root within you. Self-blame and distraction may still appear, but their grip on us will grow looser and looser.